paws and reflect...

wake...

2012-01-28T03:18:00.000-04:00

mind .. .. ..

2012-01-28T03:16:00.000-04:00

me too . . .

2012-01-28T03:15:00.000-04:00

hair of the dog...

2012-01-28T03:10:00.002-04:00

maybe. . .

2012-01-28T03:10:00.001-04:00

body...

2012-01-28T03:04:00.000-04:00

data . . .

2012-01-28T03:01:00.000-04:00

unger...

2012-01-28T02:59:00.001-04:00

dip...

2012-01-28T02:57:00.000-04:00

meet. . .

2012-01-28T02:48:00.000-04:00

curve...

2012-01-28T02:46:00.000-04:00

tim's test...

2012-01-28T02:31:00.001-04:00

Apple CEO faces odd $98 billion problem

It's hard to imagine how Apple's massive pool of assets could actually pose a problem for Tim Cook.

It's his biggest test to date

Apple CEO faces first test with cash mountain

Apple CEO, Tim Cook, has a problem, a $98 billion problem...

– 16 hours ago

Apple CEO Tim Cook has a problem, a $98 billion problem.

Just 18 months ago, Apple's $46 billion mountain of cash - while huge by most standards - attracted only muted complaints from investors, who did call for a dividend or share buyback, but were mostly happy with the meteoric rise in the stock price.

MORE RELATED TO THIS STORY
—This is Apple at its absolute worst
—Apple CEO Tim Cook’s staggering payday

With the growing cash balance now a much bigger overhang on the stock, widely considered to be undervalued, investors are clamoring more vocally for Cook to put the money to work.

No one could have foreseen just how quickly that war chest would grow.

Some analysts estimated Apple's cash holdings would increase to $65 billion at the end of 2011.

That it has swelled nearly 50 percent above even those lofty projections is nothing short of awesome.

Apple now has about $104 in cash, per share.

To paraphrase rapper P. Diddy, with more money comes more problems.

Apple's runaway success presents Cook with his first real public test as chief executive officer - figuring out what to do with the money.

Apple's cash balance is now a quarter of its $415 billion market capitalization, and roughly equals California's 2012-2013 state budget.

Even though $64 billion of Apple's cash is overseas - meaning it will have to pay a hefty tax to bring it into the United States - calls for a dividend on Wall Street grew louder after the company said on Tuesday it was in "active discussions" internally on what to do with the money.

Wall Street is strongly in favor of Apple returning the money to shareholders through buybacks or dividends, even if it is only a one-time deal.

The ultra-conservative company, which typically ignores Wall Street, gave no clues about that, during its earnings call on Tuesday.

"They are, clearly, trying to signal they are not ignoring the issue," said Michael Holt, an analyst with Morningstar.

"It doesn't mean a decision is imminent."

Others are convinced a dividend will be paid this year.

"With Apple saying it is 'actively' pursuing its options with regards to its cash balance, we believe the commentary may be setting itself up for a cash dividend in FY12," Ticonderoga Securities analyst, Brian White, said, raising his target on the stock to $666.

Katy Huberty, an analyst with Morgan Stanley, echoed White's view, saying: "Apple appears committed to making a decision on cash return in the near-term and we continue to believe a dividend makes the most sense."

Some big technology companies started paying a dividend to help allay investor concerns about slowing growth, by returning part of their ample cash holdings.

Cisco Systems Inc began paying a dividend last year, while Microsoft Corp started in 2003.

FAR TOO MUCH MONEY

Apple stock gained 25 percent in 2011, adding about $77 billion to its market cap and touched an all-time high of $454.45 on Wednesday.

Some continue to bank on a share-price rise to as high as $700.

The company's core business is throwing off massive amounts of cash every quarter - Apple recorded a $16 billion increase in cash sequentially - in part because of its reluctance to pay a dividend or buy back stock and its limited acquisition history.

The company earned a mere 0.77 percent on its cash and investments in fiscal 2011, mostly due to its preference for safe, but low-yielding U.S. Treasury and agency debt.

This is a tad higher than the 0.75 percent it earned in fiscal 2010, but down from 1.43 percent in fiscal 2009, 3.44 percent in 2008, and 5.27 percent in 2007.

Fiscal prudence has long been part of Apple's mantra and the Cupertino, California-based company runs a tight ship with total revenue rising 66 percent in fiscal 2011, but operating expenses rising only 37 percent.

For now, Apple's Chief Financial Officer, Peter Oppenheimer, has veered away from his usual script, which was to tell Wall Street Apple has always had internal discussions on the best use of its cash, with capital preservation being key.

He characterized these discussion as "active" on Tuesday.

"We recognize the cash is growing for all the right reasons," Oppenheimer said, but added he had nothing to announce.

"In the meantime, we're not letting it burn a hole in our pockets."

Oppenheimer also suggested Apple might invest in its supply chain, or make acquisitions.

Apple has, typically, preferred to acquire small companies, which has had little or no material impact on its results, so far.

Apple's major expense last year was paying the lion's share to acquire - along with Microsoft, and a few other companies - the patent portfolio of bankrupt Canadian telecommunications company, Nortel, for $4.5 billion.

Apple said it spent $4.3 billion in fiscal 2011 to acquire "property, plant and equipment", $3.2 billion in "acquisition of intangible assets", and $244 million in "payments made in connection with business acquisitions", according to its annual regulatory filing.

That is in sharp contrast to rivals such as Google Inc, which is acquiring Motorola Mobility for $12.5 billion, in cash, and which completed 54 acquisitions during the first nine months of last year alone.

The company's $44.6 billion war chest of cash and investments at the end of December was far lower than Apple's.

Google has also resisted pressure to announce a dividend, or buy back stock.

Apple may do the same in the next few months, said Michael Walkley, an analyst with Canaccord Genuity.

"We believe Apple is likely to announce a dividend during 2012, potentially next quarter, when crossing $100 billion in cash and cash equivalents," Walkley said.

"We view this as very bullish for investors, as we believe a new group of investors seeking dividends would invest in Apple, and drive shares higher."

(Reporting By Poornima Gupta; editing by Andre Grenon)

mutt...

2012-01-27T19:56:00.000-04:00

why do bots need toilets?

2012-01-27T19:44:00.000-04:00

flyby...

2012-01-27T14:13:00.000-04:00

veddy clebber...

2012-01-27T14:10:00.000-04:00

gittin to gnaw ya...

2012-01-27T14:09:00.000-04:00

penney clearance...

2012-01-27T00:40:00.002-04:00

Penney clears out clearance with new pricing plan

Store revamp and pricing plan were the first strategic announcements from Ron Johnson, who, in November, was hired away from Apple Inc....

– 14 hours ago

The store revamp and pricing plan were the first strategic announcements from Ron Johnson, who, in November, was hired away from Apple Inc (NasdaqGS:AAPL - News) -- after building that company's retail chain -- to turn around the 110-year department store chain as its chief executive.

In many ways, Penney's shift harkens back to the department stores of decades ago, when individual brands were highlighted within a larger space.

The plan also emulates some of the success Nordstrom Inc (NYSE:JWN - News) has seen by offering a limited number of discounts rather than a constant churn of price cuts.

Penney's sales performance in recent years has lagged that of Macy's Inc (NYSE:M - News) and Kohl's Corp (NYSE:KSS - News).

The chain has confused shoppers by focusing on discounts and promotions, CEO Ron Johnson said at an event in New York, where the chain introduced its new strategy.

"The customer knows the right price," Johnson said.

"To think you can fool a customer is kind of crazy."

Penney will revamp its more than 1,100 locations over the next several years, bringing in brands like home goods icon, Martha Stewart, and fashion designer Nanette Lepore.

The redesign appears necessary, especially as most of its stores are old and Macy's and Kohl's have accelerated their store facelifts.

Wall Street is waiting to see if the magic, led by Johnson at Apple's stores, known for their streamlined look and industry-leading sales per square foot, can be recreated in a department store chain that has lost its edge.

The company will offer financial details in a meeting with Wall Street analysts on Thursday.

"I am betting on the jockey, not the horse.

"I think Ron Johnson can make it happen," said Mervin Morris of Morris Management Company.

"He has taken on a very big task."

Shares of Penney were down 3 percent, at $33.54, in heavy trading on the New York Stock Exchange.

Goldman Sachs said it expects Thursday's presentation to be "more sobering" than Wednesday's flashy show, as the company will likely give conservative financial guidance.

The turnaround may already be priced into Penney shares, which trade at a higher valuation than its peers, it added.

There is a risk that tomorrow's stock move could be much bigger than the rise or fall of 5 percent that is priced into options, Goldman said.

SALES SHAKEUP

In the past, only 0.2 percent of Penney's sales came from full-price items and its 590 unique promotions a year were confusing and failed to draw shoppers, Johnson said.

Some 72 percent of Penney revenue last year came from items discounted at least 50 percent.

"At some point, you seem desperate," he said.

Starting 01 February, Penney will offer three types of pricing -- everyday pricing, best prices, and month-long deals -- and do away with clearance.

Johnson praised the upscale Nordstrom chain for holding five sales a year, at times shoppers knew to expect them, rather than the constant din of bargains offered by Penney.

It's pointless to mark up prices only to then mark them down, he said.

Discounts will remain at Penney in a different format.

Every first and third Friday, it will clear out some merchandise by putting blue tags on items, rather than putting them in a discount bin with signs proclaiming a percentage off.

Beginning next week, Penney will do away with circulars in favor of a monthly 96-page booklet of select merchandise, with stores being reorganized every month.

Each location will start adding two unique stores per month in August, with the project completed during 2015.

One of the brands being promoted at the store will be Martha Stewart.

Macy's recently sued Martha Stewart Living Omnimedia Inc (NYSE:MSO - News), accusing the company of breach of contract, for entering into an agreement to sell certain products at Penney stores.

Paying close attention to the new strategy is Penney board member, William Ackman, whose Pershing Square Capital Management is the department store's biggest shareholder.

Pershing Square holds 18.1 percent of Penney's shares and, under a deal with the company, can own as much as 26.1 percent.

Ackman, who pushed to recruit Johnson last year, sat near the front of the crowd on Wednesday.

When asked by Reuters if the changes laid out by Johnson were what he had in mind when he invested in Penney, Ackman nodded yes, saying: "These guys are incredible."

Penney is also bringing out a new advertising campaign. One television commercial features talk show host Ellen DeGeneres and another ad mocks the company's old discounting approach with a humorous take on an auctioneer.

The ads say: "No more pricing games.

"Just great prices, from the start."

In a full page ad in the Wall Street Journal on Wednesday, Penney said: "We're not interested in being the biggest store or the flashiest store.

"We want to be your favorite store."

fuelish?

2012-01-26T20:47:00.002-04:00

A simple driving trick doubles fuel efficiency?

- John Bucher

An Indian engineer says he's cracked the secret to more than doubling your car's fuel efficiency (and saving you trunkfuls of money).

For high miles per gallon (MPG), forget speed--it's all about revs.

When it comes to satisfying your desire for maximum fuel economy, it appears the slow and steady approach works best.

Looks like the Pointer Sisters had it right all along--do not come and go in a heated rush, is the key.

Indian entrepreneur, Narayanan R Menon, worked his magic, maintaining a constant 1,500 rpm instead of focusing on vehicle speed.

The results are record setting.

His achievement won him an entry into the Limca Book of World Records.

The citation of National Record 2011, credits him with having achieved fuel economy of 46.33 km per litre, the highest fuel efficiency for a diesel car as on 25 May 2010.

He drove 73.2 km on the Coimbatore-Avanashi Road bypass on NH 47, using just 1.58 litres of diesel.

The Indian Book of Records listed his achievement under "120 Best Talents of 2012".

He also finds a place in Assist World Records, Asia Book of Records, and World's Amazing Records.

"You have a magic foot," said the automaker when Narayanan R Menon told them about his car's fuel economy.

It was 46.33 km per litre of diesel.

The car, in this case, is a Tata Indigo Manza Quadrajet, not available in North America,

He claims the secret is simple.

"There is no magic.

"It has to do with driving methodology, maintaining a steady rpm, and disciplined driving, as per road conditions, is key," says the entrepreneur.

"People should always be aware of their engine RPM levels.

"We talk about speed at different gears, such as 20 km for the first gear, 30 km for the second, and so on.

"No one talks about maintaining acceleration at 1,500 rpm."

An engineer by trade, his technical background is a key factor in achieving the results.

While driving, instead of keeping your eye just on the speedometer or system information gauges, he focuses on the tachometer to monitor engine rpm.

"Initially, I was able to achieve 27 km per litre (manufacturers specs suggested a best of 21.1 km).

"This increased to 39 km per litre, and eventually the magic figure of 46.33 km per litre.

"I tested the engine efficiency of different cars such as Toyota Innova, Chevrolet Spark (coming to Canada), and a pre-owned Mercedes-Benz, as well, and discovered it was possible to achieve 1.5 times more mileage than the average at 1,500 rpm, irrespective of speed and fuel," he claims.

He says on city roads, automobiles consume more fuel, due primarily to idling in traffic, frequent gear changes for manual vehicles, lack of traffic discipline, and poor roads, are all contributing factors.

Small lifestyle changes help one achieve this feat.

"If I can achieve it, so can you," says Menon.

canuck tax...

2012-01-26T20:23:00.001-04:00

Nine tax deductions Canadians often miss

You may be cheating yourself out of a bigger refund just by overlooking or misunderstanding these savings.

Medical, moving expenses

9 tax deductions Canadians often miss...

Does the looming tax deadline have you gritting your teeth? Here's how to get a bigger, better refund.

By Madhavi Acharya-Tom Yew
– 9 hours ago

Does the looming tax deadline have you gritting your teeth?

We all have to pay taxes.

Nobody wants to pay more than what's legal.

“Unfortunately, people tend to pay more tax than they need to, because they overlook some of the savings they can take advantage of,” said Carol Bezaire, vice-president, tax, and estate planning, at Mackenzie Financial.

A deduction is valuable, because it reduces your income, for tax purposes.

Rack up enough of deductions, you’ll pull yourself down into a lower tax bracket and end up with a bigger refund, if you’re lucky.

These are worth more to those in higher tax brackets.

By contrast, a non-refundable tax credit reduces the amount of taxes owed.

The value is the same for everyone.

The term “non-refundable” refers to: if the tax credit exceeds the amount of tax payable, you WON'T get a refund for the difference.

[More: 7 mistakes that could trigger an audit]

The Toronto Star asked Bezaire to shine a light on deductions and tax credits Canadians tend to overlook, or misunderstand:

RRSPs

Contributions to Registered Retirement Savings Plans are the mother of all tax deductions.

Roughly speaking, you are allowed to contribute up to 18 per cent of your earned income, from the previous year, and deduct that amount from your income, at tax time in April.

The government even gives you an extra two months past the end of the previous calendar year to sock that money away.

That’s why January and February are known as RRSP season.

The trick here is, you can carry forward contribution room indefinitely.

You can also carry the deduction forward to use in a year when your income is higher.

Check your Notice of Assessment from the Canada Revenue Agency for more details about how much you are allowed to contribute and deduct.

If you carry forward those RRSP contributions, to deduct in a future year, keep track of them carefully, Bezaire advises.

This amount will determine how much you can put into your account in the current year.

Capital losses

Losses from buying and selling shares in an unregistered account (not your RRSP or your TFSA) can be carried back to any of the previous three years, or carried forward indefinitely.

These can be applied against capital gains to reduce your total income from investments.

“For someone who was fortunate enough to have made money on their investments in 2011, see if you’re carrying forward any capital losses and use them,” Bezaire said.

Your Notice of Assessment will also remind you of losses you haven’t used yet.

[More: 11 easy ways to get money from the tax man]

An equivalent-to-spouse-tax-credit

Tax deductions, by those who are single, divorced, or separated, with children, can be claimed for a child.

This non-refundable tax credit is worth $10,527 this year, federally.

That’s multiplied by 15 per cent, when calculating the final credit, but it’s still far higher than the $4,282 tax credit for a dependent child.

In the case of a child, the dependent has to be a Canadian, resident, under 18, and financially dependent on you.

Child care expenses

These expenses, whether for a nanny or day-care centre, must be claimed by the parent with lower net income, in most cases.

Allowable expenses are those paid for the care of a child age 6 or under, to enable the parent to work, carry on a business, or go to school.

“A lot of people forget to deduct their child-care expenses,” Bezaire said.

In many cases a nanny or care-giver may not report the income, in which case you will not be eligible for a deduction.

Medical expenses

Claim non-refundable tax credits for medical expenses paid by either you, your spouse, or common-law partner.

“People forget to take a look, or they assume it’s not eligible,” Bezaire said.

But, any non-reimbursed medical expense can be claimed, including prescription medication, dental surgery not covered by insurance, or laser eye surgery.

Expenses that total more than $2,052 or 3 per cent of net income, can be claimed.

To make the most of the tax credit, the expenses should be claimed by the person with the lower net income, Bezaire said.

Moving expenses

If you moved at least 40 km to be closer to a new job, run a business, or go to school, you may deduct the moving expenses.

Eligible expenses include transportation and storage costs, reasonable costs for meals and accommodations, real estate commission, legal fees, and costs related to changing your address, such as replacing your driver’s license, and connecting or disconnecting utilities.

“What many people overlook is, you can claim the cost of moving your children to university, or college,” Bezaire said.

[More: 10 tax tips to save you money]

Carrying charges

This refers to costs incurred in order to earn income on your investments.

Fees paid for the management of your investments, other than commissions, are eligible.

If you use a safety deposit box for safekeeping your investments, you can claim the cost as a carrying charge.

Physical fitness and arts activities for children

Eligible programs must be supervised, appropriate for children, and must be at least eight consecutive weeks or five consecutive days long, with at least half of the activities involving a significant amount of physical or artistic activity.

Additional tax credits are available for a child with a disability.

The sports programs must build muscular strength, endurance, flexibility and balance.

On the arts side, eligible programs can focus on literary, visual or performing arts, music or language.

Charitable donations

Keep in mind, these donations can be carried forward.

“If you’re doing your housekeeping and find a charity receipt and you say, ‘rats, I didn’t use it’, hang on to it.

"You can still use it,” Bezaire said.

If you have a spouse, pool them, and include them on the return of the person who pays the most tax, she said.

For more information, you can consult Canada Revenue Agency, either by phone or online.

Bezaire also has tips for getting organized: Keep all your receipts in one drawer, folder or box so you’re not running around to try to find them every April.

Always file on time, she added.

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2012-01-26T09:09:00.000-04:00

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2012-01-26T09:05:00.002-04:00

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2012-01-26T09:05:00.001-04:00

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2012-01-26T08:44:00.000-04:00

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2012-01-26T08:40:00.000-04:00

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2012-01-26T08:36:00.000-04:00

ongoing mexican scam...

2012-01-26T08:25:00.003-04:00

Ontario couple's Mexico attack a 'common' scam...

– 14 hours ago

An expert on Mexican security says the story of an Ontario man, viciously attacked last March, sounds like a familiar scam, targeting tourists in the country.

"These kinds of schemes are very popular, very common in Mexico," Walter McKay, a Mexico-based security consultant, and former Canadian police officer, told CBC News, yesterday.

As CBC News reported Tuesday, Scott Giddy of Fergus, Ont., says he suffered multiple skull fractures after he was attacked down the street from his five-star resort, Hotel Riu Emerald Bay, in Mazatlan.

It's the same resort where a Calgary woman was brutally attacked recently, suffering extensive facial injuries.

Giddy's wife, Sarah, found him covered in blood.

"He had blood pouring out of his left ear, pouring like a tap," she said.

"I just started to scream, 'Someone, call 911!' "

[no such thing in mexico, moron!]

She says a taxi driver nearby told her police wouldn't come, but offered to drive them to hospital himself.

McKay says many Mexican taxi drivers work with private clinics, or even criminal gangs.

"They call them 'piratas', pirate taxis," he says.

"Those are guys who buys Volkswagens, and paint them the same color scheme and words, like regular cab owners."

Sarah says the driver brought her husband to a private clinic, where a staff person handed the driver a wad of cash, then asked for the couple's credit card.

"The 'doctor' there looked to be about 18 years old," she said.

"He kept saying, 'I think he has a cut in his ear.' "

Scott was eventually released from the clinic, and taken to hospital, where he narrowly survived.

Sarah says he was harassed for days by a group of men.

"We ended up having to switch hotels, because we were being followed by them.

"They came to us and said, 'If you do not pay us cash, we're cutting off your husband's care'. "

McKay's advice for other tourists is to avoid taking taxis in Mexico, unless they are hired by the resort where they're staying.

The same advice is given on the Canadian Foreign Affairs website, but the Giddys said they didn't check government websites before going.

They say they fear their plight will happen to someone else.

pompous ass still running off at the mouth! GRRRR

2012-01-26T02:30:00.001-04:00

Toronto mayor compares foes to brutal dictator

Rob Ford sparks controversy by likening councilors to a man who killed twice as many people as Joseph Stalin.

Other 'Ford-isms'

Toronto mayor compares city councillors to brutal dictator...

By Andy Radia
Canada Politics
– 24 Jan, 2012

Toronto Mayor Rob Ford

Once again, Toronto mayor Rob Ford has caused a stir over his words.

According to a story in the Toronto Star, Ford was on radio AM640's John Oakley Show, Tuesday, when he compared several city councillors to ruthless Soviet dictator, Joseph Stalin.

Oakley was questioning Ford about a group of centrist Toronto city councilors, who had "gone rogue".

"I consider Josh Matlow a left-wing NDPer," he said.

"These people are all two steps left of Joe Stalin.

"I'm not discouraged by that, and I don't expect it.

"They don't care about the taxpayers.

"I know one person who does... and that's me."

When asked his thoughts on being compared to a man who killed twice as many people as Adolf Hitler, Matlow shook his head and told the Star: "Nah.

"I'll leave it."

This isn't the first time Ford has made controversial comments.

Here are some older 'Ford-isms' that, in the past, put the Toronto mayor in hot water:

14 June 2005 - During a council debate over the utility of grant programs for transgendered and transsexual people during a council debate:

"I don't understand.
"No. 1, I don't understand a transgender, I don't understand, is it a guy dressed up like a girl or a girl dressed up like a guy?
"We're funding this for, I don't know, what does it say here?
"We're giving them $3,210?"

June 2006 - During a council debate on public-health grants for community-based AIDS-prevention programs:

"If you're not doing needles, and you are not gay, you wouldn't get AIDS, probably.
"That's the bottom line.
"These are the facts."

05 March 2008 - During a council debate over holiday shopping:

"Those Oriental people work like dogs. …
"They're slowly taking over."

August 2010 - During a televised debate speaking about immigration:

"Right now, we can't even deal with the 2.5 million people in this city...
"I think it is more important to take care of people [we have] now, before we start bringing in more people."
(CP Photo)

top gadget...

2012-01-25T23:50:00.004-04:00

Top gadget outsells personal computers

Sales of this hot portable item represents 17 per cent of the total PC market.

15.4 million sold in 2011's fourth quarter

iPads Outsell Desktop PCs;

Now Equal To 17% Of Total PC Market

By Array
– 24 Jan 2012

Apple CEO Tim Cook revealed an interesting stat on today's earnings call: iPads outsold desktop PCs in the fourth quarter of 2011.

Apple reported 15.4 million iPads sold.

Cook was citing IDC figures for desktop PC sales.

A stunning development.

Two decades ago, Microsoft's mission statement was: "a PC on every desk in every home."

That mission statement no longer makes sense.

Computing has gone totally mobile, and while Windows still ships out most of the portable PCs in the world, the iPad is coming up incredibly fast.

That doesn't even take smartphones into account -- Apple sold 37 million iPhones during the quarter.

Add Android phones into the mix, and Windows probably made up less than 50% of all Internet connected devices sold in the last quarter of 2011.

(Reliable Android stats are hard to come by, as Cook noted on the call.)

Another way of looking at it: the iPad is now equal to 17% of the overall PC market, which Gartner pegged at 92.2 million units in the last quarter of 2012.

In June, it was at 11%.

A year ago, it was 7%.

No wonder Microsoft is making such a big bet on tablets with Windows 8.

The problem is, by the time Windows 8 comes out, the iPad will have been on the market, unopposed, for more than two years.

If current trends continue, it will be equal to about 25% or 30% of the PC market.

Right now, there is NO tablet market.

There IS an iPad market.

Microsoft, and its PC partners, are going to have to spend an awful lot on advertising to change that perception.

More From Business Insider

expired?

2012-01-25T19:56:00.003-04:00

How long you should really keep olive oil?

While some foods keep indefinitely, others like olive oil have a shorter shelf life than you may think.

Refrigerate to extend freshness

Food Expiration Dates 101:

How Long to Keep Spices, Peanut Butter and Other Pantry Items...

By LISA CERICOLA
– 23 Jan 2012

1. Most Dried Ground Spices

Unopened or opened: 2 to 3 years

When it comes to spices, fresh is best; but they should remain flavorful for up to three years.

While spices do not spoil, anything older than three years will most likely be lacking in flavor, aroma, and health benefits.

Store in a cool, dark place away from direct heat or sunlight, closed tightly when not in use.

To test if an herb or spice is still potent, rub or crush a small amount in your hand, taste and smell it.

If the aroma and flavor is weak, it should be discarded.

2. Olive Oil

Unopened: 2 years, in pantry or refrigerator

Opened: 18 to 24 months in the pantry or refrigerator

Store olive oil in a cool, dark place.

Keeping it refrigerated will extend its shelf life, but may cause cloudiness -- this will not effect the quality.

Once back at room temperature it will retain its normal color and texture.

3. Brown Rice

Pantry: 3 to 6 months

Refrigerator: 6 to 12 months

Freezer: 12 to 18 months

Due to its high oil content, pantry storage can cause brown rice to spoil quickly.

Once the package is opened, store brown rice in the freezer in heavy-duty freezer bag.

4. Wild, White, Jasmine, and Basmati Rice

Unopened or opened: keeps indefinitely

Store uncooked rice in a cool, dry place.

Once opened, transfer to airtight container, store in pantry, freezer, or refrigerator.

5. Honey

Unopened or opened: keeps indefinitely

Honey never goes bad.

Be sure to store it in a cool, dry place, like pantry; refrigeration will accelerate crystallization process.

Over time, honey may change color or become cloudy; stored properly, it is still safe to eat.

Check out more food expiration guidelines here

**************

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2012-01-25T19:22:00.001-04:00

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2012-01-25T19:14:00.000-04:00

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2012-01-25T19:12:00.000-04:00

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2012-01-25T19:09:00.001-04:00

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2012-01-25T19:05:00.000-04:00

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2012-01-25T19:02:00.000-04:00

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2012-01-25T19:01:00.000-04:00

names. .. ..

2012-01-25T19:00:00.000-04:00

out. . .

2012-01-25T18:50:00.000-04:00

apple results...

2012-01-25T18:21:00.002-04:00

Apple Q1 2012 Results Obliterate Expectations...

The Huffington Post

24/01/2012

Apple has posted impressive quarterly earnings for the 14-week period ending on 31 December 2011.

According to a press release, the company reported a quarterly revenue of $46.33 billion, as well as a quarterly net profit of $13.06 billion, or $13.87 per diluted share, the company's best quarterly results yet.

"These results compare to revenue of $26.74 billion, and net quarterly profit of $6 billion, or $6.43 per diluted share, in the year-ago quarter," per the release.

The Verge reports on the company's record-shattering iPhone, iPad, and Mac sales, writing, "Apple sold an astonishing 37.04 million iPhones, 15.43 million iPads, and 5.3 million Macs during the quarter, which represent increases of 128 percent, 111 percent, and 26 percent from last year.

"That's 2m more phones sold than Samsung shipped last quarter, which is astonishing."

In a statement accompanying the news, Apple CEO Tim Cook said, “We’re thrilled with our outstanding results and record-breaking sales of iPhones, iPads and Macs. [...] Apple’s momentum is incredibly strong, and we have some amazing new products in the pipeline.”

The AP reports,

The result may make Apple the world's largest maker of smartphones.

Samsung Electronics, which held that position for most of last year, has said it expects to report shipping about 35 million smartphones in the October to December quarter.
October saw the launch of the iPhone 4S, and the addition of Sprint Nextel Corp. as an iPhone carrier in the U.S.

Apple said net income in the fiscal first quarter was $13.06 billion, or $13.87 per share.
That was up 118 percent from $6 billion, or $6.43 per share, a year ago.

Analysts polled by FactSet were expecting earnings of $10.04 per share for the latest quarter, Apple's fiscal first.

Revenue was $46.33 billion, up 73 percent from a year ago.
Analysts were expecting $38.9 billion.

During the company's earnings call, Apple SVP and CFO Peter Oppenheimer announced Apple now has $97.6 billion in cash on hand.

According to TechCrunch's live blog of the call, Oppenheimer didn't announce Apple's plans, but he said the company wouldn't be “letting it burn a hole in their pocket”.

After Apple's relatively disappointing previous quarter, the company's most recent earnings are nothing short of stunning.

"It sets up Apple well for the rest of the year," Canaccord Genuity analyst Michael Walkley told Reuters.

"They are still ramping up the new geographies like the iPhone 4 in China, which they started selling in January, and we'll see in March results."

Apple Textbooks: Everything You Need To Know About Apple's New Education Software

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Research In Motion (RIM) CEOs Step Down: 7 Significant Milestones In BlackBerry Maker's Decline

RIM's New CEO, Thorsten Heins, Says No 'Drastic Change Needed' To Revive Company

New iBooks: Twitter Reacts To Apple iBooks 2, iBooks Author Education Announcement (TWEETS)

aging . . .

2012-01-25T16:59:00.000-04:00

sexy . . .

2012-01-25T16:56:00.000-04:00

furgez her... playz wizz ME!

2012-01-25T16:53:00.000-04:00

stories...

2012-01-25T16:50:00.002-04:00

NO pink! aiz boi goggie!

2012-01-25T16:50:00.001-04:00

screw...

2012-01-25T12:34:00.000-04:00

amazing...

2012-01-25T12:25:00.003-04:00

Eight-year-old girl stuns on guitar

Zoe Thomson may be young, but she's been playing guitar for two years ‒ and she can shred. Watch her viral video

Eight-year-old girl shreds guitar... goes viral!

By Grace Stanisci

Posts

By Grace Stanisci | Up Beat – 19 hours ago

Zoe Thomson can play guitar better than you.

From the time she was six, Thomson has been covering the likes of Linkin Park, Metallica, and Guns N' Roses.

A student at the Newbury Rock School in Berkshire, U.K., the pint-sized guitarist spends her days playing music with other kids her age and being mentored by bands like U.K.'s The Crave, New Device and Tin Soldiers.

Her videos have garnered millions of views and show that you can be an amazing musician at any age.

She's only eight years old.

A video of Thomson playing the guitar to Stratovarius' "Stratosphere" has gone viral.

Upon seeing this video, Twitter began buzzing with compliments and words of utter shock.

A few examples:

@eventsgeek tweets: If I have kids some day, I can only hope she/he will be this musically gifted.

@groovehouse tweets: Excuse me while I pick my jaw up off the floor.

@JedediahBila tweets: This kid is so much cooler than I am.

Currently, Thomson plays lead guitar, and is the only girl in a children's U.K. rock group, called The Mini Band.

Their performance of Metallica's "Enter Sandman" gained the rock band's attention, and inspired them to send a special message of encouragement to the youngsters.

During the video, drummer Lars Ulrich comments, "You guys rock!

"You guys are very cool!"

Teasingly adding, "Maybe, someday, we can work something out?

"We could come out and open up for all y'all, if you guys will have us.

"We're just getting started.

"We're an up-and-coming hard rock band, out in Northern California, so if you'll have us, we're here for the taking."

Watching these kids makes one realize that the future of rock is a bright one.

Find The Time - The Mini Band

peel p50...

2012-01-25T12:09:00.004-04:00

World's smallest car makes a comeback

Only 50 electric Peel P50s were made back in the '60s, but it's being sold again, for a short time.

'Retro appeal'

World's smallest car, back in production...

~Jeff Voth

At just one-sixteenth the weight of the smallest existing Canadian car, the British-made Peel P50 is tiny.

The world's smallest car is back in production after its original run of 50 in the 1960s.

It's electric, and coming to a street near you.

If you are a fan of the vastly popular British TV show, Top Gear, you might remember the episode in which Jeremy Clarkson drives the single-seat Peel P50 to work and around the offices of the BBC.

It was a classic.

The old saw, "Good things come in small packages", may be true, since two British businesses have resurrected the single-seater Peel P50, the car listed in the Guinness Book of World Records as the smallest production car ever made.

A total of 25 units are set to be built.

Only 50 P50s were made in the 1960s and the new owners, car enthusiasts Gary Hillman and Faizal Khan, claim original models sell for more than $100,000.

The pair is hoping to develop a merchandise business to capitalize on the retro appeal of the quirky runabouts.

The P50 weighed less than 60 kilograms and was just 137 cm long.

The P50 was so small, it could be lifted, by their rear bumper, and wheeled into tight parking spots.

By comparison, the newest small car in Canada, the micro-sized Scion iQ, weighs 960 kg, and stretches to an enormous 304.5 cm.

Don't try picking up this car, at home or the office.

The P50's early advertising material said it had enough room for "one adult and a shopping bag".

It had a single door on the left hand side, one windscreen wiper and one headlight.

Today, some would call this a baby stroller on steroids.

The latest incarnation has a modern twist; the new P50 is available with two electric motors, putting out just 1kW.

The electric vehicle has a top speed of 12km/h and a range of about 25 kilometres.

Prices start at about $20,000.

Reports say only nine of the vehicles are left.

Better get yours, fast!

fb BASTARDS! ...i don't LIKE/WANT the change GRRRR

2012-01-25T03:29:00.004-04:00

Facebook switching all users to Timeline

Everyone on the social network will soon get the new profile page, whether they want it, or not.

Key changes

Facebook Timeline MANDATORY rollout:

You have 7 days to scour your past...

By Mike Wehner, Tecca
Today in Tech
– 12 hours ago

The time to edit your online persona is... now!

Facebook is the virtual home to more than 800 million active users; any change to how the network operates is a big deal.

Nothing could be bigger for the social hotspot than completely revamping everyone's front-facing profile page; and exactly what is happening... today.

Starting this morning, the new Timeline feature — it has been an optional switch — is now mandatory.

The Timeline differs from the default profile pages we know and love in several ways.

Rather than showcasing only your most recent posts, your personal front page can be scrolled back months, or years, at a time.

Most importantly, this change can offer visitors a glimpse at your entire social networking past, all the way back to the day you joined.

The revamp can be both a blessing and a curse for seasoned social networkers.

It can produce a bit of pleasant nostalgia, but also drag up some of your less proud public moments.

Left untouched, your Timeline may remind of you of breakups, job troubles, or even a few unfortunate party photos you have long since buried.

Depending on your settings, these black marks on your digital past could allow new followers — including friends or business associates — to see a side of you better kept tucked away.

Privacy is already a hot topic for Facebook users, and the network's litany of sharing options can be difficult to navigate, even for the most experienced users.

The company isn't oblivious to how the Timeline may drag up some unwanted past events, so a short buffer zone is in place, to allow you to modify your online persona, before making its new debut.

You now have until 31 January to erase any past Facebook scars you'd prefer to hide.

The mandatory Timeline rollout will catch some by surprise, but you don't have to fall victim to the ghosts of past updates.

Take some time to review your social networking history, don't hesitate to prune anything you wouldn't want on the front page of a local newspaper, because... the clock is ticking.

You could always jump ship to Google+, instead.

This article originally appeared on Tecca

scots wha ha'e...

2012-01-25T01:37:00.000-04:00

**

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=xXMrC54QiNA

*

address to a haggis...

2012-01-25T00:59:00.004-04:00

Established 1885

Our Motto

" A man's a man for a' that"

Search Tips

But mark the Rustic, haggis fed,
The trembling earth resounds his tread.
Clap in his walie nieve a blade,
He'll mak it whissle;
An' legs an' arms, an' heads will sned,
Like taps o' thrissle.


Address to A Haggis This famous poem by Burns is regularly recited during celebrations throughout the World, whenever Haggis makes an appearance on the menu ! Yet for many, some basic questions may need an answer. What is A Haggis ? Why did Burns write about it? What does the Address to A Haggis mean? Why is Haggis served during Scottish cultural celebrations? What is a Haggis? Without wanting to disappoint anyone….it is NOT the mythical furry creature…… with its two inside legs shorter than its two outside legs..…to allow it to run easily along hillsides! Nor is it any other kind of living creature. A Haggis is a very old Scottish dish, which combines meats, spices and oatmeal to create a very rich, unusual, but none the less delicious feast. The factual and historic description of Haggis is sometimes off-putting to people who have not tried it. Fortunately, modern techniques in the preparation and presentation of Haggis make it an acceptable delicacy to almost everyone's palate. In fact, it's simply delicious. If you haven't tried haggis …..authentic Scottish Haggis…..you must! Whilst here in Scotland it is not consumed on a daily basis, it does feature regularly on many people's home menus throughout the year. It makes "guest" appearances on a more formal basis throughout the year, whenever Scottish culture is celebrated. ARRRRRGH !!! In the olden days, the preparation of a Haggis went something like this :- Take the liver, lungs, and heart of a sheep; boil them. Mince the meats and mix with chopped onions, toasted oatmeal, salt, pepper, and spices. Take one properly cleaned sheep's stomach. Stuff the cleaned stomach with the above-prepared contents. Sew up the stomach (leaving enough room for expansion, to avoid a large messy explosion) and boil. Serve and eat. Lovely! Okay... now you've returned from the bathroom, be reassured modern Haggis, prepared here in Scotland, is not so gruesome. The best meats are selected, (including tripe and offal) and prepared with finest oatmeal and spices…..but served in a synthetic skin, representative of the old technique. The quality manufacturers of Haggis, here in Scotland, pride themselves in their guarded secret recipes, and prepare the Haggis to exacting standards. Haggis has a higher quality of content than your average "sausage"…..and is extremely healthy…..so please don't be put off! Nowadays, there are even vegetarian versions, made from the finest Scottish produce. Now you know about Haggis, what are its origins? In the days when hunting was a means of basic survival, all parts of the dead animal had to be used. The skins were used as clothing, the gut and tissue used as thread for sewing, with the main carcass and organs used as food. The bulk content meat was often dried or salted, and proved suitable for a long "shelf life". The innards and organs of the beast were the most perishable parts, and had to be consumed first. Someone, somewhere, sometime, recognised the stomach made an excellent cooking vessel, and mixing the organs with spices and meal, placing them in this natural "pot", and cooking the contents provided a highly nutritional and tasty meal. This basic method of cooking has been traced back to Greek and Roman times. The name "Haggis" has its origins in more recent history, and links are shown to Scandinavian "hag" meaning to "hew", or the French "hageur" - "to cut", or German "hackwurst" meaning "minced sausage". Who knows? It is difficult to identify, exactly, when the great Scottish "haggis", as described by Burns, came to be. For sure, in his day, and during the 18th century, the now famous meal was regularly served in Scotland as a tasty, and very healthy meal. It is only from here, in Scotland, you can savour a genuine, Scottish haggis! Why did Burns write about the Haggis? An interesting question, and I doubt if we will ever know exactly what inspired him to write The Address To A Haggis. What is clear, Burns was presenting the Haggis as being a unique and symbolic part of Scottish identity and culture. Through the power of the spoken word, and the imagery of vivid language, Rabbie successfully portrayed a picture in the mind, which has long since become the focal point of the celebration of Burns... and Scotland. When written, only a short time had passed since the Jacobite Rebellion. The French Revolution was alive, and America was in the aftermath of the War of Independence. In Britain, the political struggle between Scotland and England was very much to the fore, and Burns wrote passionately on the subject. War, political struggle, and the Scottish identity were the catalyst for the poem. The humble Haggis was merely the vehicle used to demonstrate his proud Scottish nationalism, which he does in a lighthearted way. Burns clearly thought Haggis was a great meal, but he also recognised its nutritional value, its popularity, and its unusual preparation and presentation. It is, uniquely, Scottish. Therefore, it's easy to see why Rabbie made the link between Scotland's Identity at that time, and the serving of Haggis to ordinary Scots, as an ordinary Scottish meal. I suppose it was a strange subject to write about, but this is the mastery of Burns! What does the Address to a Haggis mean?
Address To A Haggis Fair fa' your honest, sonsie face, Great chieftain o' the puddin-race! Aboon them a' ye tak your place, Painch, tripe, or thairm: Weel are ye wordy o' a grace As lang's my arm. The groaning trencher there ye fill, Your hurdies like a distant hill, Your pin wad help to mend a mill In time o' need, While thro' your pores the dews distil Like amber bead. His knife see rustic Labour dight, An' cut you up wi' ready sleight, Trenching your gushing entrails bright, Like ony ditch; And then, O what a glorious sight, Warm-reekin, rich! Then, horn for horn, they stretch an' strive: Deil tak the hindmost! on they drive, Till a' their weel-swall'd kytes belyve, Are bent lyke drums; Then auld Guidman, maist like to rive, "Bethankit!" 'hums. Is there that owre his French ragout Or olio that wad staw a sow, Or fricassee wad mak her spew Wi' perfect sconner, Looks down wi' sneering, scornfu' view On sic a dinner? Poor devil! see him ower his trash, As feckless as a wither'd rash, His spindle shank, a guid whip-lash, His nieve a nit; Thro' bloody flood or field to dash, O how unfit! But mark the Rustic, haggis fed, The trembling earth resounds his tread. Clap in his walie nieve a blade, He'll mak it whissle; An' legs an' arms, an' heads will sned, Like taps o' thrissle. Ye Pow'rs wha mak mankind your care, And dish them out their bill o' fare, Auld Scotland wants nae skinking ware That jaups in luggies; But, if ye wish her gratefu' prayer, Gie her a haggis!	The Translation Fair is your honest happy face Great chieftain of the pudding race Above them all you take your place Stomach, tripe or guts Well are you worthy of a grace As long as my arm The groaning platter there you fill Your buttocks like a distant hill Your skewer would help to repair a mill In time of need While through your pores the juices emerge Like amber beads His knife having seen hard labour wipes And cuts you up with great skill Digging into your gushing insides bright Like any ditch And then oh what a glorious sight Warm steaming, rich Then spoon for spoon They stretch and strive Devil take the last man, on they drive Until all their well swollen bellies Are bent like drums Then, the old gent most likely to rift (burp) Be thanked, mumbles Is there that over his French Ragout Or olio that would sicken a pig Or fricassee would make her vomit With perfect disgust Looks down with a sneering scornful opinion On such a dinner Poor devil, see him over his trash As week as a withered rush (reed) His spindle-shank a good whiplash His clenched fist.the size of a nut. Through a bloody flood and battle field to dash Oh how unfit But take note of the strong haggis fed Scot The trembling earth resounds his tread Clasped in his large fist a blade He'll make it whistle And legs and arms and heads he will cut off Like the tops of thistles You powers who make mankind your care And dish them out their meals Old Scotland wants no watery food That splashes in dishes But if you wish her grateful prayer Give her a haggis!
Why is Haggis served during Scottish cultural celebrations? Following the death of Burns, a number of Burns Clubs were formed, to celebrate and honour his memory... what better than to serve the great Haggis during this celebration, and to recite his famous: Address to a Haggis? This custom has been carried through the years, and is now firmly established as one of the key recitals at any Burns Supper, celebrated by millions throughout the world. All manner of Scottish celebrations choose to have Haggis on their menu. It is a truly excellent choice for such occasions, and almost everyone who tries it..loves it! There is nothing better than real, authentic, Scottish haggis, served traditionally with "neeps n tatties". At home with the family, entertaining guests, or at organised events... go for Haggis! Burns wrote the poem as a celebration of Scotland, and all things Scottish. In some ways, it is quite strange and rather amusing to think, one of the worlds greatest poets, should write so passionately about a simple meal. Rabbie himself, would, no doubt find the celebrity status of the Haggis hilarious, particularly since he is responsible for that fame! All in all, it is very fitting the humble Scottish Haggis has continued and prospered in modern society, and has itself now become representative of Scotland. ~Mac The World Burns Club Address to a Haggis in our poem archive

fave...

2012-01-25T00:40:00.004-04:00

‘Tam O’Shanter’ voted best Robert Burns poem...

The statue of Burns in Edinburgh's George Square;

below, a giant wicker sculpture of Tam O'Shanter

By MARTYN McLAUGHLIN
Published: 23 January 2012

IT is a supernatural masterpiece, bringing to life Satan’s frenzied jig in an Ayrshire churchyard, surrounded by a gaggle of warlocks and witches.

More than two centuries after its publication, some Scots have declared Tam O’ Shanter their favourite Robert Burns poem.

A poll of more than 1,000 people saw the epic work held up as the finest example of the Bard’s output, beating his other bestknown poems to the top spot.

Nearly a quarter of respondents decided the poem, detailing a hellish scene in the grounds of the Auld Kirk of Alloway, as their favourite.

The comically macabre 1790 piece, Burns’ only narrative poem, has long been regarded as one of the Bard’s most outstanding creations, and inspired generations of artists, writers and playwrights.

It relates the story of the inebriated protagonist, happening upon a coven at the kirk, where Satan leads a gaggle of warlocks and witches in a dance “til roof and rafters a’ did dirl”.

Tam is pursued by the witches, but manages to reach the River Doon, and make a narrow escape on his horse.

The poll, commissioned to coincide with Burns Night celebrations the world over, found 23 per cent of people regarded Tam O’Shanter as their Burns poem of choice,

Second in the YouGov survey was, A Man’s a Man for A’ That, with 17 per cent of respondents rating the poem – famous for its liberal ideas of society in the 18th century – as their No 2 choice.

Following closely in third place is the Address to a Haggis, which 16 per cent of Scots declared their favourite.

Fiona Hyslop, cabinet secretary for culture and external affairs said, while she favoured another, less well-known Burns poem, the appeal of Tam O’ Shanter was plain to see.

She said: “Robert Burns is Scotland’s greatest cultural icon.

"The results from this poll show our national Bard still holds a special place in the nation’s heart.

“Tam O’ Shanter is considered, by many, as one of the best examples of narrative poem, while no Burns Supper would be complete without its vital ingredient – the Address to a Haggis.

“My personal favourite is Mary Morrison, a simple yet very romantic poem about longing.”

Scotland’s Makar, Liz Lochhead, cited To a Mouse as her favourite and praised its strong and vivid imagery that continues to resonate.

Admitting, being asked to select just the one poem was an “impossible choice”, she described the work as her “first favourite, best and dearest”.

She added: “At eight, I already loved that wee sleekit cow’rin tim’rous beastie being told, with perfect plain sincerity, ‘I’m truly sorry Man’s Dominion/has broken Nature’s social union’.

"A tiny, trembling creature standing in for our whole laid-waste and abused planet.”

Towns and cities are gearing up for Burns Night, including the Big Burns Supper festival in Dumfries, which will involve more than 2,000 performers.

Ms Hyslop added: “Burns remains the people’s poet, and his legacy is of immense value to Scotland’s image abroad.

“His vast collection of work has inspired generations across the globe, and the Year of Creative Scotland 2012, is the perfect time to celebrate all that is great about our culture and creativity both past and present.”

• These are the four favourite Burns poems, chosen by a poll of more than 1,000:

1. Tam O’Shanter: 23%

2. A Man’s a Man for A’ That: 17%

3. Address to a Haggis: 16%

4. My Luve is Like a Red, Red Rose: 14%

The highest percentage – 30 – chose: “Don’t know”.

*************************************

Tam O' Shanter

by Robert Burns

Tam O' Shanter is a wonderful, epic poem, in which Burns paints a vivid picture of the drinking classes in the old Scotch town of Ayr, in the late 18th century.

It is populated by several unforgettable characters, including of course, Tam himself, his bosom pal, Souter (Cobbler) Johnnie, and his own long suffering wife, Kate, "Gathering her brows like gathering storm; nursing her wrath to keep it warm".

We are also introduced to Kirkton Jean, the ghostly, "winsome wench", Cutty Sark, and let's not forget his gallant horse, Maggie.

The tale includes humour, pathos, horror, social comment, and, in my opinion, some of the most beautiful lines Burns ever penned.

For example: "But pleasures are like poppies spread, You sieze the flower, its bloom is shed; Or like the snow falls in the river, A moment white--then melts for ever".

Tam o' Shanter (Original)

When chapmen billies leave the street,
And drouthy neibors, neibors meet,
As market days are wearing late,
An' folk begin to tak the gate;
While we sit bousing at the nappy,
And getting fou and unco happy,
We think na on the lang Scots miles,
The mosses, waters, slaps, and styles,
That lie between us and our hame,
Where sits our sulky sullen dame.
Gathering her brows like gathering storm,
Nursing her wrath to keep it warm.

This truth fand honest Tam o' Shanter,
As he frae Ayr ae night did canter,
(Auld Ayr, wham ne'er a town surpasses
For honest men and bonie lasses.)

O Tam! had'st thou but been sae wise,
As ta'en thy ain wife Kate's advice!
She tauld thee weel thou was a skellum,
A blethering, blustering, drunken blellum;
That frae November till October,
Ae market-day thou was nae sober;
That ilka melder, wi' the miller,
Thou sat as lang as thou had siller;
That every naig was ca'd a shoe on,
The smith and thee gat roaring fou on;
That at the Lord's house, even on Sunday,
Thou drank wi' Kirkton Jean till Monday.
She prophesied that late or soon,
Thou would be found deep drown'd in Doon;
Or catch'd wi' warlocks in the mirk,
By Alloway's auld haunted kirk.

Ah, gentle dames! it gars me greet,
To think how mony counsels sweet,
How mony lengthen'd, sage advices,
The husband frae the wife despises!

But to our tale:-- Ae market-night,
Tam had got planted unco right;
Fast by an ingle, bleezing finely,
Wi' reaming swats, that drank divinely
And at his elbow, Souter Johnny,
His ancient, trusty, drouthy crony;
Tam lo'ed him like a vera brither--
They had been fou for weeks thegither!
The night drave on wi' sangs and clatter
And ay the ale was growing better:
The landlady and Tam grew gracious,
wi' favours secret,sweet and precious
The Souter tauld his queerest stories;
The landlord's laugh was ready chorus:
The storm without might rair and rustle,
Tam did na mind the storm a whistle.

Care, mad to see a man sae happy,
E'en drown'd himsel' amang the nappy!
As bees flee hame wi' lades o' treasure,
The minutes wing'd their way wi' pleasure:
Kings may be blest, but Tam was glorious.
O'er a' the ills o' life victorious!

But pleasures are like poppies spread,
You sieze the flower, its bloom is shed;
Or like the snow falls in the river,
A moment white--then melts for ever;
Or like the borealis race,
That flit ere you can point their place;
Or like the rainbow's lovely form
Evanishing amid the storm.--
Nae man can tether time or tide;
The hour approaches Tam maun ride;
That hour, o' night's black arch the key-stane,
That dreary hour he mounts his beast in;
And sic a night he taks the road in
As ne'er poor sinner was abroad in.

The wind blew as 'twad blawn its last;
The rattling showers rose on the blast;
The speedy gleams the darkness swallow'd
Loud, deep, and lang, the thunder bellow'd:
That night, a child might understand,
The Deil had business on his hand.

Weel mounted on his gray mare, Meg--
A better never lifted leg--
Tam skelpit on thro' dub and mire;
Despisin' wind and rain and fire.
Whiles holding fast his gude blue bonnet;
Whiles crooning o'er some auld Scots sonnet;
Whiles glowring round wi' prudent cares,
Lest bogles catch him unawares:
Kirk-Alloway was drawing nigh,
Whare ghaists and houlets nightly cry.

By this time he was cross the ford,
Whare, in the snaw, the chapman smoor'd;
And past the birks and meikle stane,
Whare drunken Chairlie brak 's neck-bane;
And thro' the whins, and by the cairn,
Whare hunters fand the murder'd bairn;
And near the thorn, aboon the well,
Whare Mungo's mither hang'd hersel'.--
Before him Doon pours all his floods;
The doubling storm roars thro' the woods;
The lightnings flash from pole to pole;
Near and more near the thunders roll:
When, glimmering thro' the groaning trees,
Kirk-Alloway seem'd in a bleeze;
Thro' ilka bore the beams were glancing;
And loud resounded mirth and dancing.

Inspiring bold John Barleycorn!
What dangers thou canst make us scorn!
Wi' tippeny, we fear nae evil;
Wi' usquabae, we'll face the devil!--
The swats sae ream'd in Tammie's noddle,
Fair play, he car'd na deils a boddle.
But Maggie stood, right sair astonish'd,
Till, by the heel and hand admonish'd,
She ventured forward on the light;
And, vow! Tam saw an unco sight

Warlocks and witches in a dance;
Nae cotillion brent-new frae France,
But hornpipes, jigs strathspeys, and reels,
Put life and mettle in their heels.
A winnock-bunker in the east,
There sat auld Nick, in shape o' beast;
A towzie tyke, black, grim, and large,
To gie them music was his charge:
He scre'd the pipes and gart them skirl,
Till roof and rafters a' did dirl.--
Coffins stood round, like open presses,
That shaw'd the dead in their last dresses;
And by some develish cantraip slight,
Each in its cauld hand held a light.--
By which heroic Tam was able
To note upon the haly table,
A murders's banes in gibbet-airns;
Twa span-lang, wee, unchristen'd bairns;
A thief, new-cutted frae a rape,
Wi' his last gasp his gab did gape;
Five tomahawks, wi blude red-rusted;
Five scymitars, wi' murder crusted;
A garter, which a babe had strangled;
A knife, a father's throat had mangled,
Whom his ain son o' life bereft,
The gray hairs yet stack to the heft;
Wi' mair o' horrible and awfu',
Which even to name was be unlawfu'.
Three lawyers' tongues, turn'd inside out,
Wi' lies seam'd like a beggar's clout;
Three priests' hearts, rotten, black as muck,
Lay stinking, vile in every neuk.

As Tammie glowr'd, amaz'd, and curious,
The mirth and fun grew fast and furious;
The piper loud and louder blew;
The dancers quick and quicker flew;
They reel'd, they set, they cross'd, they cleekit,
Till ilka carlin swat and reekit,
And coost her duddies to the wark,
And linket at it in her sark!

Now Tam, O Tam! had thae been queans,
A' plump and strapping in their teens,
Their sarks, instead o' creeshie flannen,
Been snaw-white seventeen hunder linnen!
Thir breeks o' mine, my only pair,
That ance were plush, o' gude blue hair,
I wad hae gi'en them off my hurdies,
For ae blink o' the bonie burdies!

But wither'd beldams, auld and droll,
Rigwoodie hags wad spean a foal,
Louping and flinging on a crummock,
I wonder did na turn thy stomach!

But Tam kend what was what fu' brawlie:
There was ae winsome wench and waulie,
That night enlisted in the core,
Lang after ken'd on Carrick shore;
(For mony a beast to dead she shot,
And perish'd mony a bonie boat,
And shook baith meikle corn and bear,
And kept the country-side in fear.)
Her cutty-sark, o' Paisley harn
That while a lassie she had worn,
In longitude tho' sorely scanty,
It was her best, and she was vauntie,-
Ah! little ken'd thy reverend grannie,
That sark she coft for he wee Nannie,
Wi' twa pund Scots, ('twas a' her riches),
Wad ever grac'd a dance of witches!

But here my Muse her wing maun cour;
Sic flights are far beyond her pow'r;
To sing how Nannie lap and flang,
(A souple jade she was, and strang),
And how Tam stood, like ane bewitch'd,
And thought his very een enrich'd;
Even Satan glowr'd, and fidg'd fu' fain,
And hotch'd and blew wi' might and main;
Till first ae caper, syne anither,
Tam tint his reason ' thegither,
And roars out, "Weel done, Cutty-sark!"
And in an instant all was dark:
And scarcely had he Maggie rallied,
When out the hellish legion sallied.

As bees bizz out wi' angry fyke,
When plundering herds assail their byke;
As open pussie's mortal foes,
When, pop! she starts before their nose;
As eager runs the market-crowd,
When "Catch the thief!" resounds aloud;
So Maggie runs, the witches follow,
Wi' mony an eldritch skriech and hollo.

Ah, Tam! ah, Tam! thou'll get thy fairin'!
In hell they'll roast thee like a herrin'!
In vain thy Kate awaits thy commin'!
Kate soon will be a woefu' woman!
Now, do thy speedy utmost, Meg,
And win the key-stane o' the brig;
There at them thou thy tail may toss,
A running stream they dare na cross.
But ere the key-stane she could make,
The fient a tail she had to shake!
For Nannie, far before the rest,
Hard upon noble Maggie prest,
And flew at Tam wi' furious ettle;
But little wist she Maggie's mettle -
Ae spring brought off her master hale,
But left behind her ain gray tail;
The carlin claught her by the rump,
And left poor Maggie scarce a stump.

No, wha this tale o' truth shall read,
Ilk man and mother's son take heed;
Whene'er to drink you are inclin'd,
Or cutty-sarks run in your mind,
Think! ye may buy joys o'er dear -
Remember Tam o' Shanter's mare.

Tam o' Shanter (Translation)

When the peddler people leave the streets,
And thirsty neighbours, neighbours meet;
As market days are wearing late,
And folk begin to take the road home,
While we sit boozing strong ale,
And getting drunk and very happy,
We don’t think of the long Scots miles,
The marshes, waters, steps and stiles,
That lie between us and our home,
Where sits our sulky, sullen dame (wife),
Gathering her brows like a gathering storm,
Nursing her wrath, to keep it warm.

This truth finds honest Tam o' Shanter,
As he from Ayr one night did canter;
Old Ayr, which never a town surpasses,
For honest men and bonny lasses.

Oh Tam, had you but been so wise,
As to have taken your own wife Kate’s advice!
She told you well you were a waster,
A rambling, blustering, drunken boaster,
That from November until October,
Each market day you were not sober;
During each milling period with the miller,
You sat as long as you had money,
For every horse he put a shoe on,
The blacksmith and you got roaring drunk on;
That at the Lords House, even on Sunday,
You drank with Kirkton Jean till Monday.
She prophesied, that, late or soon,
You would be found deep drowned in Doon,
Or caught by warlocks in the murk,
By Alloway’s old haunted church.

Ah, gentle ladies, it makes me cry,
To think how many counsels sweet,
How much long and wise advice
The husband from the wife despises!

But to our tale :- One market night,
Tam was seated just right,
Next to a fireplace, blazing finely,
With creamy ales, that drank divinely;
And at his elbow, Cobbler Johnny,
His ancient, trusted, thirsty crony;
Tom loved him like a very brother,
They had been drunk for weeks together.
The night drove on with songs and clatter,
And every ale was tasting better;
The landlady and Tam grew gracious,
With secret favours, sweet and precious;
The cobbler told his queerest stories;
The landlord’s laugh was ready chorus:
Outside, the storm might roar and rustle,
Tam did not mind the storm a whistle.

Care, mad to see a man so happy,
Even drowned himself in ale.
As bees fly home with loads of treasure,
The minutes winged their way with pleasure:
Kings may be blessed, but Tam was glorious,
Over all the ills of life victorious.

But pleasures are like poppies spread:
You seize the flower, its bloom is shed;
Or like the snow fall on the river,
A moment white - then melts forever,
Or like the Aurora Borealis rays,
That move before you can point to their place;
Or like the rainbow’s lovely form,
Vanishing amid the storm.
No man can tether time or tide,
The hour approaches Tom must ride:
That hour, of night’s black arch - the key-stone,
That dreary hour he mounts his beast in
And such a night he takes to the road in
As never a poor sinner had been out in.

The wind blew as if it had blown its last;
The rattling showers rose on the blast;
The speedy gleams the darkness swallowed,
Loud, deep and long the thunder bellowed:
That night, a child might understand,
The Devil had business on his hand.

Well mounted on his grey mare, Meg.
A better never lifted leg,
Tom, raced on through mud and mire,
Despising wind and rain and fire;
Whilst holding fast his good blue bonnet,
While crooning over some old Scots sonnet,
Whilst glowering round with prudent care,
Lest ghosts catch him unaware:
Alloway’s Church was drawing near,
Where ghosts and owls nightly cry.

By this time he was across the ford,
Where in the snow the pedlar got smothered;
And past the birch trees and the huge stone,
Where drunken Charlie broke his neck bone;
And through the thorns, and past the monument,
Where hunters found the murdered child;
And near the thorn, above the well,
Where Mungo’s mother hung herself.
Before him the river Doon pours all his floods;
The doubling storm roars throught the woods;
The lightnings flashes from pole to pole;
Nearer and more near the thunder rolls;
When, glimmering through the groaning trees,
Alloway’s Church seemed in a blaze,
Through every gap , light beams were glancing,
And loud resounded mirth and dancing.

Inspiring, bold John Barleycorn! (whisky)
What dangers you can make us scorn!
With ale, we fear no evil;
With whisky, we’ll face the Devil!
The ales so swam in Tam’s head,
Fair play, he didn’t care a farthing for devils.
But Maggie stood, right sore astonished,
Till, by the heel and hand admonished,
She ventured forward on the light;
And, vow! Tom saw an incredible sight!

Warlocks and witches in a dance:
No cotillion, brand new from France,
But hornpipes, jigs, strathspeys, and reels,
Put life and mettle in their heels.
In a window alcove in the east,
There sat Old Nick, in shape of beast;
A shaggy dog, black, grim, and large,
To give them music was his charge:
He screwed the pipes and made them squeal,
Till roof and rafters all did ring.
Coffins stood round, like open presses,
That showed the dead in their last dresses;
And, by some devilish magic sleight,
Each in its cold hand held a light:
By which heroic Tom was able
To note upon the holy table,
A murderer’s bones, in gibbet-irons;
Two span-long, small, unchristened babies;
A thief just cut from his hanging rope -
With his last gasp his mouth did gape;
Five tomahawks with blood red-rusted;
Five scimitars with murder crusted;
A garter with which a baby had strangled;
A knife a father’s throat had mangled -
Whom his own son of life bereft -
The grey-hairs yet stack to the shaft;
With more o' horrible and awful,
Which even to name would be unlawful.
Three Lawyers’ tongues, turned inside out,
Sown with lies like a beggar’s cloth -
Three Priests’ hearts, rotten, black as muck
Lay stinking, vile, in every nook.

As Thomas glowered, amazed, and curious,
The mirth and fun grew fast and furious;
The piper loud and louder blew,
The dancers quick and quicker flew,
They reeled, they set, they crossed, they linked,
Till every witch sweated and smelled,
And cast her ragged clothes to the floor,
And danced deftly at it in her underskirts!

Now Tam, O Tam! had these been young girls,
All plump and strapping in their teens!
Their underskirts, instead of greasy flannel,
Been snow-white seventeen hundred linen! -
The trousers of mine, my only pair,
That once were plush, of good blue hair,
I would have given them off my buttocks
For one blink of those pretty girls !

But withered hags, old and droll,
Ugly enough to suckle a foal,
Leaping and flinging on a stick,
Its a wonder it didn’t turn your stomach!

But Tam knew what was what well enough:
There was one winsome, jolly wench,
That night enlisted in the core,
Long after known on Carrick shore
(For many a beast to dead she shot,
And perished many a bonnie boat,
And shook both much corn and barley,
And kept the country-side in fear.)
Her short underskirt, o’ Paisley cloth,
That while a young lass she had worn,
In longitude though very limited,
It was her best, and she was proud. . .
Ah! little knew your reverend grandmother,
That skirt she bought for her little grandaughter,
With two Scots pounds (it was all her riches),
Would ever graced a dance of witches!

But here my tale must stoop and bow,
Such words are far beyond her power;
To sing how Nannie leaped and kicked
(A supple youth she was, and strong);
And how Tom stood like one bewitched,
And thought his very eyes enriched;
Even Satan glowered, and fidgeted full of lust,
And jerked and blew with might and main;
Till first one caper, then another,
Tom lost his reason all together,
And roars out: ‘ Well done, short skirt! ’
And in an instant all was dark;
And scarcely had he Maggie rallied,
When out the hellish legion sallied.

As bees buzz out with angry wrath,
When plundering herds assail their hive;
As a wild hare’s mortal foes,
When, pop! she starts running before their nose;
As eager runs the market-crowd,
When ‘ Catch the thief! ’ resounds aloud:
So Maggie runs, the witches follow,
With many an unearthly scream and holler.

Ah, Tom! Ah, Tom! You will get what's coming!
In hell they will roast you like a herring!
In vain your Kate awaits your coming !
Kate soon will be a woeful woman!
Now, do your speedy utmost, Meg,
And beat them to the key-stone of the bridge;
There, you may toss your tale at them,
A running stream they dare not cross!
But before the key-stone she could make,
She had to shake a tail at the fiend;
For Nannie, far before the rest,
Hard upon noble Maggie pressed,
And flew at Tam with furious aim;
But little was she Maggie’s mettle!
One spring brought off her master whole,
But left behind her own grey tail:
The witch caught her by the rump,
And left poor Maggie scarce a stump.

Now, who this tale of truth shall read,
Each man, and mother’s son, take heed:
Whenever to drink you are inclined,
Or short skirts run in your mind,
Think! you may buy joys over dear:
Remember Tam o’ Shanter’s mare.

A copy of an advert for Tam O'Shanter Pipe Tobacco
(Reproduced from the Burns Chronicle of 1932)

it's: NOT I DID! eeeeeeeeeeeeedjit! GRRRRR

2012-01-24T22:38:00.001-04:00

lodge...

2012-01-24T22:37:00.001-04:00

matc...

2012-01-24T22:32:00.000-04:00

before ...

2012-01-24T22:31:00.000-04:00

class. . .

2012-01-24T22:26:00.000-04:00

bogus...

2012-01-24T22:19:00.001-04:00

grip!

2012-01-24T18:18:00.000-04:00

blame...

2012-01-24T18:15:00.000-04:00

mai kar pet...

2012-01-24T18:11:00.000-04:00

keep it busy!

2012-01-24T17:19:00.002-04:00

Keeping brain sharp may ward off Alzheimer's protein...

By Julie Steenhuysen
– 21 hours ago

CHICAGO (Reuters) - People who challenge their brains throughout their lifetimes -- through reading, writing, and playing games -- are less likely to develop protein deposits in the brain linked with Alzheimer's, U.S. researchers said yesterday.

Prior studies suggested well-educated people, educated and stay mentally active, build up brain reserves that allow them to stay sharp, even if deposits of the destructive protein, called beta amyloid, form in the brain.

The latest study, based on brain-imaging research, suggests people who stay mentally engaged, beginning in childhood, and remain so throughout their lives, actually develop fewer amyloid plaques.

"We're not talking about the brain's response to amyloid.

"It's about the actual accumulation of amyloid," Dr. William Jagust, of the University of California, Berkeley, whose study appears in the Archives of Neurology, said in an interview.

"It's a new finding."

While small, the study also shows, starting brain-stimulating activities early enough might offer a way to prevent Alzheimer's-related plaques from building up in the brain.

Currently, there are no drugs that can prevent Alzheimer's disease, which scientists now think begins 10 to 15 years before memory problems set in.

Alzheimer's Disease International estimates there are 36 million people with the disease, worldwide.

As the population ages, that number will increase to 66 million by 2030, and to 115 million by 2050.

Last week, the U.S. government released draft recommendations for a national Alzheimer's plan that calls for finding effective treatments or prevention strategies by 2025.

The new study involved the use of an imaging agent, the Pittsburgh Compound B, or PiB, which works with positron emission tomography, or PET scanners.

This chemical sticks to and highlights deposits of beta amyloid.

"Beta amyloid is the protein many people feel may be the initiating factor in Alzheimer's disease.

"It is the protein in the plaques of the brains of people with Alzheimer's," Jagust said.

STARTING CROSSWORD PUZZLES LATE WON'T HELP

The researchers studied 65 healthy, cognitively normal people aged 60 and older.

Study participants were asked a battery of questions about how mentally active they had been during different periods of their lives, starting at age 6.

The questions included whether they had read newspapers, went to the library, wrote letters or emails and played games.

They also underwent extensive testing to assess their memory and thinking skills, and their brains were scanned using the new tracer to look for amyloid deposits in the brain.

The team compared the brain scans with those of 10 Alzheimer's patients and 11 healthy people, in their 20s.

They found, people who had been the most mentally active had lower levels of beta amyloid than others who had been less mentally active.

People in the study, who had recently taken up crosswords and other mental exercises, did not appear to see much benefit.

"What our data suggests is, a whole lifetime of engaging in these activities has a bigger effect than being cognitively active just in older age," said Susan Landau, another Berkeley researcher who worked on the study.

She said amyloid probably starts accumulating many years before symptoms appear, so by the time memory problems start, there is little that can be done.

"The time for intervention may be much sooner," she said in a statement.

One weakness is, the study relies on people's memory of their mental activities, Jagust said.

He said staying mentally engaged may make the brain more efficient, which could have a protective effect, but that is still not clear.

(Reporting by Julie Steenhuysen; Editing by Michele Gershberg and Sandra Maler)

new find...

2012-01-24T15:02:00.004-04:00

Mysterious 'winged' structure discovered

An unusual 1,800-year-old ruin found in England leaves archaeologists grasping for answers.

'No known parallels'

Mysterious 'Winged' Structure from Ancient Rome Discovered...

By Owen Jarus
–23 Jan 2012

A recently discovered mysterious "winged" structure in England, which in the Roman period may have been used as a temple, presents a puzzle for archaeologists, who say the building has no known parallels.

Built around 1,800 years ago, the structure was discovered in Norfolk, in eastern England, just to the south of the ancient town of Venta Icenorum.

The structure has two wings radiating out from a rectangular room, that in turn leads to a central room.

"Generally speaking, during the Roman Empire people built within a fixed repertoire of architectural forms," said William Bowden, a professor at the University of Nottingham, who reported the find in the most recent edition of the Journal of Roman Archaeology.

The investigation was carried out in conjunction with the Norfolk Archaeological and Historical Research Group.

The winged shape of the building appears to be unique in the Roman Empire, with no other examples known.

"It's very unusual to find a building like this, where you have no known parallels for it," Bowden told LiveScience.

"What they were trying to achieve by using this design is very difficult to say."

The building appears to have been part of a complex that includes a villa to the north, and at least two other structures to the northeast and northwest.

An aerial photograph suggests the existence of an oval or polygonal building with an apse located to the east.

The winged building

The foundation of the two wings and the rectangular room was made of a thin layer of rammed clay and chalk.

"This suggests the superstructure of much of the building was quite light, probably timber and clay-lump walls with a thatched roof," writes Bowden.

This raises the possibility the building was not intended to be used long term.

[Photos of Mysterious Stone Structures]

The central room, on the other hand, was made of stronger stuff, with its foundations crafted from lime mortar mixed with clay and small pieces of flint and brick.

That section likely had a tiled roof.

"Roman tiles are very large things, they’re very heavy," Bowden said.

Sometime after the demise of this wing-shaped structure, another building, this one decorated, was built over it.

Archaeologists found post holes from it with painted wall plaster inside.

Bowden said few artifacts were found at the site and none that could be linked to the winged structure with certainty.

A plough had ripped through the site at some point, scattering debris.

Also, metal detecting is a major problem in the Norfolk area, with people using metal detectors to locate and confiscate materials, something that may have happened at this site.

Still, even when the team found undisturbed layers, there was little in the way of artifacts.

"This could suggest the winged building wasn't used for a very particularly long time," Bowden said.

The land of the Iceni

Researchers are not certain what the building was used for.

While its elevated position made it visible from the town of Venta Icenorum, the foundations of the radiating wings are weak.

"It's possible this was a temporary building constructed for a single event or ceremony, which might account for its insubstantial construction," writes Bowden in the journal article.

"Alternatively, the building may represent a shrine or temple on a hilltop, close to a Roman road, visible from the road as well as from the town."

Adding another layer to this mystery is the ancient history of Norfolk, where the structure was found.

The local people in the area, who lived here before the Roman conquest, were known as the Iceni.

It may have been their descendents who lived at the site and constructed the winged building.

Iceni architecture was quite simple and, as Bowden explained, not as elaborate as this.

On the other hand, their religion was intertwined with nature, something which may help explain the wind-blown location of the site.

"Iceni gods, pre-Roman gods, tend to be associated with the natural sites: the springs, trees, sacred groves, this kind of thing," said Bowden.

The history between the Iceni and the Romans is a violent one.

In A.D. 43, when the Romans, under Emperor Claudius, invaded Britain, they encountered fierce resistance.

After a failed revolt in A.D. 47, they became a client kingdom of the empire, with Prasutagus as leader.

When he died, around A.D. 60, the Romans tried to finish the subjugation, in brutal fashion.

"First, his Prasutagus' wife, Boudicea was scourged, and his daughters outraged.

"All the chief men of the Iceni, as if Rome had received the whole country as a gift, were stripped of their ancestral possessions, and the king's relatives were made slaves," wrote Tacitus, a Roman writer in The Annals.

(From the book, "Complete Works of Tacitus," 1942, edited for the Perseus Digital Library.)

This led Boudicea (more commonly spelled Boudicca) to form an army and lead a revolt against the Romans.

At first she was successful, defeating Roman military units and even sacking Londinium.

In the end the Romans rallied and defeated her at the Battle of Watling Street.

With the Roman victory the rebellion came to an end, and a town named Venta Icenorumwas eventually set up on their land.

[Top 12 Warrior Moms in History]

"The Iceni vanish from history effectively after the Boudicca revolt in A.D. 60-61," said Bowden.

While they vanished from written history, archaeological clues hint their spirit remained very much alive.

Bowden and David Mattingly, an archaeologist at the University of Leicester, both point out the area has a low number of villas compared with elsewhere in Britain, suggesting the people continued to resist Roman culture long after Boudicca's failed revolt.

This lack of villas, along with problems attracting people to Roman settlements in the area, "can be read as a transcript of resistant adaption and rejection of Roman norms," writes Mattingly in his book, "An Imperial Possession: Britain in the Roman Empire". (Penguin Books, 2007).

There is "still a fairly strong local identity", said Bowden, who cautioned, while local people may have lived at the complex, the winged building is out of character, for both Roman and Iceni architectural styles, it leaves his team with a mystery.

find the baby face... X3 [and 3 ladybugs]!

2012-01-23T14:21:00.001-04:00

oops!

2012-01-23T14:16:00.001-04:00

[From Holly] I was wrong

Holly Lisle via aweber.com

newsletter@novelwritingschool.com

I was wrong.

Last week, I looked at the EULA for a piece of software called iBook Author, and based on reading the EULA and on reading the interpretations of the EULA by folks better at this than I am, and *based on the understanding
iBook Author was designed to be the creation point of original work, and not as a formatter of work created on other platforms*, and with that understanding, seeing in Apple's EULA a serious and unethical rights grab,
I pulled my own work from Apple's website on principle, and informed my students I could no longer recommend iBookstore as a market for their work.

While the comments I received were primarily emotional posts, about hating Apple, or opinion pieces based on nothing, I also got several quiet, reasoned comments about how the software was NOT a word processor, but is a
software packager, a creator of interactive software, designed specifically for use on the iPad.

I downloaded the software.

The folks who said, "It's not a word processor" were right.

It's not software for novelists.

It's pretty nice software for taking courses you've created and adding interactive media to them.

It creates software usable only on the iPad.

I would not present a novel in this software, or software like this for other platforms.

But iBook Author would be one way to create a version of my How To Write A Series course, for example, which depends heavily on video, with transcripts and worksheets.

Paying Apple to sell the course on its site truly would be no different than paying Apple its commission for selling my books through its bookstore.

Apple has done nothing wrong with either the software or its EULA.

Folks who misunderstood the nature of the software, including me, got it wrong.

My actions and final recommendations?

ACTIONS

* I've put my books for sale on iBookstore, again.

* I'm sending this email to my students and readers explaining the error I made, and where my error lay.

RECOMMENDATIONS

* If you use iBook Author, make sure you have created your work in a word processor that will allow you to preserve formatting, pagination, headers and footers, footnotes, bibliographies, etc.
in a form you can easily copy and paste INTO iBook Author and others.

* I recommend iBookstore as an acceptable market for writers, along with Barnes & Noble, Amazon.com, and CreateSpace, all of which follow open accounting practices with your work, pay regularly,
and currently offer favorable terms to self-publishers.

* I strongly support presenting your work equally and simultaneously in multiple markets and formats, in order to keep competition strong among bookstores, and in order to keep the terms
of each bookstore most favorable to the individual independent writer.

* Don't give any market special treatment or exclusivity: Doing so will permit that market to kill competition, and eliminate your ability to work for favorable terms.

Thanks to those of you who took the time to point out what the software actually is, and to show me by example where I made my mistake.

I am pleased to be able to correct my error.

Write with joy,

Holly Lisle

P.S. If you're interested in commenting, this email is also a post on my weblog, and you may comment at this link:

http://hollylisle.com/how-to-say-i-was-wrong

4613 N. University Drive
#234,
Coral Springs, FL 33067

spice it up...

2012-01-23T02:00:00.002-04:00

Healthiest spices to use in your meals

Cinnamon stabilizes your blood, turmeric is antibacterial, and ginger is good for colds.

How to use them all

Six healthiest spices to add to your recipes...

By Marni Wasserman
– 17 Jan, 2012

The many fragrant, warming herbs and spices available from the around the world are not only fabulous for flavoring, they also have wonderful healing properties.

Look to them to nourish both your organs and your soul, while making comforting meals and recipes taste even more delicious.

Six warming spices you should include in your recipes this winter, both for their delicious flavors and for their health benefits.

Related: The top seven pantry staples in the Chatelaine Kitchen

1. Cinnamon

Sweet and pungent, pleasant and warming.

In Chinese medicine, cinnamon is used to support the spleen and the pancreas, stomach, bladder, kidney, and liver meridians.

Cinnamon aids in digestion and circulation, and helps to treat diarrhea, nausea, vomiting, and menstrual cramps.

This spice is also well known for its blood-stabilizing abilities.

Related: Eight immune-boosting nutrients to keep you healthy through flu season

2. Ginger

This popular root has a peppery, pungent taste.

It is warming, stimulates digestion, and boosts circulation, respiration, and nervous system function.

Ginger is useful for colds and fevers, and alleviates motion sickness and nausea.

It is also an anti-inflammatory, and destroys intestinal parasites.

Related: Cutting calories: 22 tips that don't sacrifice flavour

3. Turmeric

This yellow spice is the highest known source of beta carotene.

It tones the spleen, pancreas, liver, and stomach, and strengthens the immune system and enhances digestion and helps to dissolve cysts and gallstones.

Turmeric is antibacterial and may help diabetics control blood sugar.

Related: Five health benefits of clementines

4. Cardamom

This spice, common in Indian recipes, is sweet, pungent, and warming.

It also acts upon the spleen, pancreas, stomach, lung, and kidney meridians.

It aids in digestion, relaxes spasms, and cuts mucus, making it useful in lung tonics.

It also eases coughs, breathlessness, burning urination, incontinence, and hemorrhoids.

Related: A healthy diet can help lower genetic risk factors for heart disease

5. Cloves

Bitter, spicy and warming.

They tonify the kidney, spleen, pancreas, and stomach.

Cloves also aid digestion, and treat nausea, hiccups, and vomiting.

6. Cumin

Similar in color to turmeric, cumin is pungent and bitter.

This super spice aids the digestive system, improves liver function, promotes assimilation of other foods, and relieves abdominal distention, gas, and colic, as well as migraines and headaches.

Coconut vegetable curry

Ingredients:

1 onion

1-2 teaspoons sea salt

¼ cup coconut oil

1 sweet potato, peeled and cut into ¾-inch cubes

1 medium butternut squash, peeled and cut into ¾-inch cubes

1 medium cauliflower, cut into bite-size florets

1 cup shelled peas, cooked

½ red cabbage

1 cup coconut milk

1 cup water

(vegetables can be roasted)

Curry blend:

1 teaspoon coriander

2 teaspoons cumin

½ teaspoons turmeric

½ teaspoon cayenne pepper

¼ teaspoon fenugreek

1 teaspoon cinnamon

¼ teaspoon cardamom seeds, no pods

¼ teaspoon mustard seeds

4 cloves garlic, minced

1 tablespoon fresh minced ginger, grated

Directions:

1. In a large skillet, sauté onions, with one teaspoon salt in oil until they begin to soften and brown.

Add squash, cook ten minutes more.

Add sweet potatoes and curry blend, continue sautéing another five minutes, stirring often.

2. Add cauliflower to the top of the squash and sweet potatoes, being careful no to stir the mixture.

Add water, bring to a boil.

Cover and simmer til vegetables are tender (15-20 minutes).

3. With a wooden spoon, smash some of the squash in the curry mixture against the sides of the skillet to thicken the sauce.

Stir in the peas, season to taste with salt.

Marni Wasserman is a culinary nutritionist in Toronto, whose philosophy is stemmed around whole foods.

She is dedicated to providing balanced lifestyle choices through natural foods.

With passion and experience, she strives to educate individuals on how everyday eating can be simple and delicious.

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